You've heard them all too many times before: A cold day in hell. When pigs fly. On the 12th of never. A snowball's chance in hell.
The idioms of improbability. Beaten like a dead horse and milked drier than a dairy cow in an Oberweiss plant to such a dire extent that only clichés could describe just how cliche they've become.
Well, I have a new one for you. A fresh locution that, at this very time yesterday, could have been considered the rarest idiom of improbability in existence: When Foran agrees with Blackhawks trade speculation.
As it turns out, Satan better be wearing his thickest pair of plush mittens because that circulating hearsay of a potential Patrick Sharp/Blackhawks reunion, from strictly a hockey perspective, actually makes a pretty good amount of sense.
What I mean by strict hockey perspective is that such a move would make the most sense in terms of addressing the Blackhawks immediate needs. This means there is no nostalgia-fueled, fan service feeding my opinion. I firmly stand by the notion that if the Blackhawks, indeed, attempt to re-acquire Patrick Sharp, it won't be to appease the countless droves of love-stricken fans that, to this day, continue to sport their number 10 sweaters to the United Center night-in and night-out, it will because the team needs scoring depth and Patrick Sharp is the best option available.
There isn't much to elaborate on. If the near-basement dwelling, major disappointment that is the Dallas Stars opt to deal their pending unrestricted free agent at the deadline, there's no doubt in my mind the Blackhawks will be one of the many team's inquiring about the 35-year old winger's services.
To put it bluntly, the struggling Jonathan Toews needs a damn scoring compliment after skating aside depth forwards for much of the year and Sharp could be just the familiar face he needs to get back on track. If I'm popping blood vessels each time I hear some academic hockey theorist bitching about Toews' so-called regression evidenced through his lack of scoring this season (that's some scholarly analyzation, guys), I can only imagine how the venerable Blackhawks captain feels.
You try scoring when A. You're not a prolific scorer yourself and B. Your every night wingers are a 38-year old two-way specialist and a kid who has less NHL games under his belt than Marian Hossa has points this season.
Sharp, who has been limited to just 20 games after sustaining a concussion earlier this season, has been quietly productive and otherwise consistent for the struggling Stars. While his 9 points in 20 contests don't exactly scream "Sell the farm!", it's his recent production (7 points in his last 8) that hint the old man can still produce with the best of them when at full health.
Toews would be doing cartwheels throughout the 300-level if his beloved, former teammate was ushered back into the fold.
Aside from the obvious scoring facet, the reason why the former Blackhawk makes much more sense than, say, Toronto's James van Riemsdyk or Colorado's Gabriel Landeskog is because Sharp is, indeed, an unrestricted free agent at season's end. This means no long-term commitments and, most importantly, no added salary cap issues seeping into next season. A simple three months of Sharp's services and, voila, he's free to sign wherever he wants, whenever he wants and at whatever price he wants with no consequence for the Blackhawks.
Of course, there are potential deterrents, though.
Dallas isn't going to just hand a division rival what is, perhaps, the missing link between first round elimination and a fourth Stanley Cup in eight years. After last year's disastrous deadline which saw top prospects and draft picks, alike, being flung around like a Kardashian at an MTV awards show afterparty, I simply can't see Bowman dishing out too much for a 35-year old rental the team will own for just 30 games or so.
I firmly believe that the Blackhawks General Manager learned his lesson last season following his, in hindsight, laughably overzealous dealings for busts Andrew Ladd, Dale Weise and Tomas Fleischmann, especially with former prospects Phillip Danault and Teuvo Teravainen thriving in Montreal and Carolina this season.
Pretty much the only significant risk factor worth fretting over if you're Stan Bowman are those hoards of Patrick Sharp-hypnotics rioting at the realization that their dearly beloved, skating eye-candy would be tragically departing them for a second time in three years. Stan is a cold, calculating supercomputer of a man who simply cannot comprehend the flood of emotions or heartbreak among Patrick Sharp aficionados he'd be precipitating when he allows him to walk at season's end. I doubt he cares about your feelings, anyway. As I said before, if he chooses to re-acquire Sharp it will be for the team, not for you.
If anything, I hope the deal commences solely for the benefit of Jonathan Toews. 2016-2017 thus far has undoubtedly been the harshest of the 28-year old's prestigious and celebrated career. I'd love nothing more than for Toews to stick it right in the ears of his borderline-treacherous critics who, you very damn well know, will revert immediately back to adoring him at first sign of progression.
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